bulk erasing my past

I haven’t been blogging for a few days, or even touching my PowerBook, which I have a very ambivalent attitude to at the moment, and have considered using it as a frisbee for most of the last week. In a moment of Terminal-induced confusion, I managed to delete both my original and backup of my email. Five years of emails gone. The data salvage is … well, mostly it’s crap, completely unsorted and in giant semi-corrupted files of tens of megs. The process of getting this shit back into Apple Mail is torturous and severely manual, and I really just want to break things … I do have a hard copy back-up from March last year to work with but the interim 10 months have been some of the most special and memorable of my life, and … my history pretty much exists in the electronic world, and so I feel right now like I have had that destroyed and so exist far less than I did a week ago. This isn’t an asinine lesson in backing up, which I did every week, it’s that at some point, no amount of backing up is enough, it can all be lost in an instant. So with hell just finished, (and the accompanying post-show blues I always get) and monster amounts of pre-production looming for the next piece in Guangzhou, I really just want to fuck off up a mountain and hurl napalm at everyone and everything.